Mark Cuban will never own a baseball team

...or at least while the Selig administration is around, he won't.

Man it would be fun to watch Mark Cuban jump onto the field after a close call and get thrown out of a game he's not even playing in.

But, I just don't see that happening. Cuban's most likely destination would be Los Angeles, in light of Dodgers owner Frank McCourt's inability to pay out salaries. If that's the case, Cuban's best chance is to hope that McCourt heads off to bankruptcy court to try and get control of the franchise's fate. Then when he lost, the courts would start auctioning off the team to the highest bidder and Cuban might have a shot at winning. Then we'd get to see the comedic drama unfold as MLB commissioner Bud Selig began to challenge the outcome.

I'd love to hear McCourt's arguement to a court judge as to why he's qualified enough to own a team though. Like I said, when the payroll deadline rolls around next Thursday he's going to look like a perturbed Monopoly man.

Okay, so let's say McCourt doesn't go to bankruptcy court, he fails to make payroll next Thursday and MLB seizes control of the Dodgers, which will most likely happen. Can't Cuban just outbid everyone once MLB auctions off the franchise? Wrong. The Selig administration set a price and let people interview for ownership when the Montreal Expos were up for sale in 2002. It's not just about the money and I don't think Cuban is winning over commissioner Selig with his charm.

But wait. It's not only Selig's decision, right? Doesn't Cuban just have to get a majority vote by the other 29 team owners? True, but I can't see Cuban fitting in with the other kids. What I can see is Selig imposing his will and influence on the owners as he has done the last two decades. In other words, I'd be so bold as to say Rob Schneider would have a better chance at owning a team than Cuban.

At the end of the day, what do I know? If McCourt, savvying investing Fred Wilpon, Liverpool loving John W. Henry, Nazi party supporting Marge Schott, midget pinch-hitting Bill Veeck, bonus-giving for mustache-growing Charlie Finley and Nintendo can own baseball teams shouldn't an outspoken NBA champion be able to?